Giving Jesus the Right Place in Your Marriage

When Jesus is our everything, we are freed to truly love another because we don’t need anything in return.

Sit with that statement a moment. Read it over two or three times.  Allow it to sink in. What would happen if we simply made Jesus our everything, and then rested in Him? If we were so filled by Him, that we could let that overflow? What if we lived needing nothing from others? Free of needing acceptance, affirmation, or identity found in someone else or their opinion.

This is the way we were intended to live. But sadly, we often make our significant other or our spouse our “everything”, and we were never meant to. Once we do this, bitterness and anger begin to brew. Frustration and eventually devastation take root in our hearts and grow into an unruly tree of resentment. That tree takes up all the room and thwarts the selfless and overflowing love.

Unmet expectations will hurt a relationship quicker than anything else.
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If we went over every single issue in our relationships, we would probably find all of them come back to this. If we are trying to get what only God can give from our spouse, we will always be left unsatisfied and in pain. The relationship cannot thrive under that weight and pressure. But the choice is ours, daily. We choose which one we will allow to be king of our heart, and that will determine everything.

When it is another human being, we are left empty and unfulfilled. Our souls cannot be at peace because we will always want and need more of something they cannot supply. If we give another the power to break or make us, that may break both us and the relationship.

When Jesus is the only one who can carry the weight of fulfilling us, we are whole. We are free. We are found in one who can carry it all and perfectly love us. We are held by one who can hold us in the palm of His hand and complete us. Then we are freed up to truly love another without needing or expecting anything from them in return.

We are full to the brim.

Photo Copyright: stockbroker / 123RF Stock Photo


Ana is currently an English major, recently married to her wonderful husband, Malik! She is passionate about woman’s ministry and hopes to inspire and encourage women to grow in the Lord and become all He desires for them to be. She feels called to writing and sharing her experiences on her journey with the Lord.

  • This is an excellent article, Ana! You share a wonderful truth that every marriage needs. Thank you for sharing it.

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