At the End of the Rainbow


Around St. Patrick’s Day, there is always a lot of talk about being lucky and making wishes. Everyone wants to chase rainbows and find their pots of gold. Yet, so many people don’t realize they don’t need luck on their side or to make random wishes because they have already been blessed with God’s riches.

Have you ever seen a rainbow? They are amazing, beautiful, and mysterious. It’s been said that if you follow a rainbow to its end a pot of gold will be awaiting you. Now, I have seen quite a few rainbows in my day, and there is something interesting to me about this concept of a pot of gold at its end. Rainbows never seem to really start or stop anywhere; they just kind of trail off. So, if someone were to try and track down the jackpot, my guess is that they would be searching for quite a long time with nothing to show for it but a pot full of frustration and disappointment.

We laugh at the thought of someone actually trying to chase down rainbows and pots of gold, but that is exactly what so many of us do most of our lives. We run around looking for something that doesn’t exist, hoping that it will fulfill our every hope and dream. Maybe it’s a career endeavor, fitness goal, dream home, or the perfect car. There are lots of things we place our hope in, and then if and when we get them, we realize it wasn’t the answer we were really looking for. This false expectation of “one-stop-shop” fulfillment is especially true when it comes to relationships.

There is no doubt that God created us to be relational human beings. We crave and desire to be known at our very core. Relationships are not the problem; it’s our misuse and misunderstanding of their purpose in our lives. We misplace our desire by expecting a romantic relationship to fulfill us when, in fact, our fulfillment can only come from our relationship with Christ.

It’s easy to chase the rainbows of personal contentment, love, and happiness through the affirmation and warmth of a special someone, but the truth is that we can’t expect a guy or a girl to fill the God-shaped hole in our lives. Romantic relationships are not a replacement for our relationship with Christ; they are merely an extension of it. God loves us more than we can possibly imagine, and only He can give purpose, contentment, and fulfillment that will last. “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full” (John 10:10). His love is overflowing, His grace never-ending, and His joy abundant. In fact, if you are looking for someone to love you, then look no further than God who sent His only Son to die on the cross for you. He says, “The very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” God’s love for you is incomprehensible, and we need to discover our purpose and contentment in Him.

When we place our personal relationship with Christ first, then “all these things will be given to you as well” (Matthew 6:33). That includes finding someone to share life with. As I said before, God created us to be relational in nature, which means that He is well aware of those needs and willing to meet them. In fact, relationships were His idea.

God created men and women to be in relationship with one another, so relationships are obviously important to Him. The problem is that people often forget that God cares about their lives and relationships. As a result, they panic about finding someone to share the rest of their life with and take the steering wheel, trying to control and direct their own paths. Instead of allowing God to navigate their love story, they go searching for that imaginary “pot of gold” at the end of the rainbow.

Cutting God out of the orchestration of your love story can only lead to disappointment, brokenness, sadness, and pain. God created you and knows you better than anyone else, which means He is the most incredible and perfect matchmaker out there. That doesn’t mean you jump ship and avoid all personal responsibility. It is still up to you to put yourself out there and make yourself available for Him to open up doors.

How exactly do you allow God to be the Author of your love story and still do your part? There’s no exact formula, of course, but there are some basic things to keep in mind.

  • Pursue God’s calling in your life, seek after Him, and He will open doors for you that will lead you down the path He designed and intended. You might be pleasantly surprised at who you bump into along the way.
  • Get involved with activities that allow you to connect with fellow Christian singles. Perhaps it is a mission trip with your church or some other community service opportunity. These are great ways to do what God has called you to do but also be in a position to meet people doing the same thing.
  • Pray. It is easy to underestimate the power of prayer, but don’t! Bring your concerns, desires, and hopes before the Lord. John 16:24 says, “Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete.”
  • Safeguard your heart. It’s easy to get reckless at times with your thoughts, choices, and behaviors. “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life” (Proverbs 4:23). Remember that whether you are single, dating, or married, it is crucial to keep your heart, mind, and body in line with God’s Word.

It is easy to get caught up in chasing our own rainbows and pots of gold. You may think it’s all about making wishes and getting lucky, but those are just legendary lies from Satan pulling you away from the truth. God is in control. He cares about you more than you can imagine or comprehend, which is why He is orchestrating a masterpiece for and through you. It is a matter of laying down your rainbows and trusting in His riches, plans, and promises for your life.



About

Ashley McIlwain, M.A., is a Marriage and Family Therapist, speaker, and writer. She is the founder and C.E.O. of the non-profit organization, Foundation Restoration, and blog LittleWifey.com, which are comprehensive resources committed to restoring the very foundation of society - marriage. She is committed to and passionate about helping relationships thrive. Ashley holds a bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Palm Beach Atlantic University and a master’s degree in Clinical Psychology with a specialization in Marriage and Family Therapy from Azusa Pacific University. Ashley previously served as Managing Editor for StartMarriageRight.com where she helped launch and develop the website into a hub for premarital preparation. Currently she and her husband, Steve, reside in Southern California.


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