The one thing you can count on in marriage is that you and your spouse won’t always see eye to eye. There will come those times when there will be quarrels, arguments, and disagreements. Some will be heated, some won’t. Sometimes you will be right, and sometimes you won’t.
I’ve been learning that a lot of times, I am right. My views, my thoughts, my position is right. But it’s how I handle that position that can sometimes matter more. You see, in my pride, I can be right, but still end up being wrong because of how I handle it.
My response can be wrong.
I don’t think God is on my side when I get prideful. It doesn’t matter that I’m on the right side of an argument. I need to remain humble and prayerful as I seek to show my spouse that I might have valid points and insightful direction. I certainly don’t win him over when I browbeat him with an “I am right, you are wrong” kind of stance!
It can be just as hard to be right and not walk over someone with your “rightness” as it can be to be wrong. For even though you know you are right, if your spouse doesn’t agree, that “right” way may not always get chosen. And that’s extra hard.
It is more important in a marriage relationship to value and prize communication than it is to value and prize “rightness.” For it’s not about “me” and “him” – it’s about “us.” And “we” need to travel challenges and hurdles together, not separately. For separate victories aren’t really victories if they aren’t won with the person we promised to BE “ONE” with!
So, sometimes it doesn’t matter if I’m right. What matters is how I handle being right. And that can be the biggest test of all.