Why I Want Your Brains (But I’m Not A Zombie)

Dear Future Husband,

I want your brains.

Not to eat; I’m not a zombie. Actually, I’m hoping 2015 is the year we get to be done with zombies.

But in a two-heads-are-better-than-one kind of way.

Exhibit ATrivia What?

You know what’s really not fair when you’re single? Trivia Crack.

Married people have twice the brain power and twice the lifetimes of accruing somewhat useless (that is, unless you’re playing Trivia Crack) bits of knowledge. Don’t try to tell me that married people don’t immediately turn to their spouse on those unpredictably obscure questions. No, I don’t know exactly which colors are on the Brazilian flag, and I definitely don’t know the name of Britney Spears’ first nephew (nor do I care).

Together, we could rule the world. The world of Trivia Crack.

But I’m thinking about more than just playing quiz games.

Exhibit B—All The Things Are Hard

There are a lot of times I wish I could ask your opinion or help on what to do. For example, taxes. I’m not so great at math and numbers kind of make me hyperventilate. But having another set of eyes and another brain to help me figure out what to do would be really helpful.

Or here’s a good one: health insurance. Since I’m self-employed and not under my parents’ anymore, I have to purchase my own. I just don’t even want to think about it.

Or what about which car to get? Where to go to church? Should I buy or rent? What to get my brother for his birthday?

Not that I can’t think for myself or make my own decisions, but these kinds of everyday life tasks and figuring can be challenging, and I’d appreciate your help. But there are even more important things that I think teamwork would really improve.

Exhibit C—Kingdom Things

I’m not in full-time ministry, but I do a lot of things related to ministry. And sometimes (okay, a LOT of the time) I just don’t know what to do. Sometimes I just need to brainstorm (which is pretty hard with only one brain, actually). Sometimes I need help on what to say when I really just want to yell. Sometimes I need to be knocked down a couple notches. Sometimes I need the rough edges worn off. Sometimes I just need your brain. And your heart.

God created us for His glory. He created us to love Him and to love Jesus and to love people because of Jesus. And I’m convinced that this is one of the main reasons God created marriage—mutual spiritual edification and loving others for the glory of God.*

The old adage is true—two heads are better than one. With two of our brains working on the same dream or problem, we have twice the ideas, twice the experiences, twice the mistakes to learn from and twice the victories to celebrate.

So yes, I want your brains. But more than that, I want your heart. Because I can’t wait to love Jesus with you and love others together because of Him.

Until we marry,


*Being single doesn’t mean you can’t dream, or be sharpened, or love people. It just means you need to find friends or family to get on your team, and get started. Marriage is not a prerequisite for thinking, ministry, edification, or glorifying God. Don’t believe that lie.


Emily Gehman is a Storytelling Coach by day, freelance writer by night, and follower of Jesus at all hours. She works with AUHENTIK Magazine, writes at emilygehman.com and tweets @emilygehman. Emily has eight nieces and nephews and is in a long-term relationship with her dog, Rockwell.

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