“I’d rather you not touch my shower towel, okay?” I quizzically glanced at my new husband, Ted. My freshly washed hands frozen in mid-air, just inches from his towel. Was he being serious? After all, he did have dry humor down to an art. This wouldn’t be the first time he’d fooled me into believing…
Each year in December, there are moments when I feel like my husband Ted is a regular Grinch compared to my Buddy the Elf. Take, for example, the much-anticipated Christmas tree trimming. Without fail, for ten years now, Ted has consistently pulled a Harry Houdini at what’s traditionally a group activity. Yep, he mysteriously escapes…
“I can fix that,” Ted states. This four-word phrase—stolen from the 2003 film, Holes—is a staple at our house. Much like Texas Pete’s hot sauce and duct tape, Ted keeps it handy. It’s a mantra he’s made his own. And who benefits from it the most? Well, aside from his very fortunate employer, that would…
In the weeks that led up to our wedding, my soon-to-be husband Ted informed our friends, family, and anyone who would listen of his impending death. “Death?” you ask. Yep, death. Death, that is, to his single self. You know, the self that could buy a new Nord Electro on a whim. Or stay up…
It’s said that desperate times call for desperate measures. For my husband Ted and me, one such measure occurred en route to our honeymoon destination, Paris. On the car ride from our condo to the airport, it struck us that we’d forgotten one very important item: a camera. I mean, seriously, who — prior to…
